Recently, I received some feedback from someone who told me that I need to “tone it down.” Meaning, this person was finding the light of joy I radiate to be “too much.” Have you ever had an encounter like this?

In her perspective, it is insensitive for someone like myself to boldly follow my heart’s passion without thinking of the harm it might do to someone else. She told me that I might be hurting other people’s feelings when I’m seen doing something that they want to do themselves, but can’t do themselves for some reason (be it physical, financial or mental limitations, etc).

She told me, “You don’t think about how other people might feel about what you do.”

Actually, there was a long period of my life that I did care what people thought of me and made choices accordingly that were out of alignment with my truth.

There was a time when words like hers would’ve felt harmful to me and stopped me from shining my light. 

Dear One,

On February 1st, 2023, I woke up to a new, unknown reality after having just moved out of my treasured temple home of 12 years. The journey of leaving my little homestead cabin way out in an isolated part of the desert was truly the most heartbreaking experience I’ve known. It’s incredible that it was one year ago that I closed and locked the door to that life- a life that laid the groundwork for extraordinary transformation.

How quickly time passes and how swiftly things change.

I expressed the grief of this departure through a written piece and newly produced photography work in arts & literary print journal Luna Arcana’s most recent issue. It was a piece written in the depths of the pain while I was still living in the cabin, as a way to process this change and to give voice to the higher perspective of it all. What a gift it was to honor this healing process creatively and to share it with others.

When do you feel the most naked? Perhaps when you have expressed something to another and you fear how it will be received. Perhaps when you’ve created something dear to your heart and you let others see it. Perhaps when you’ve let go of a familiar life/path/identity and you are deep in the discomfort of not knowing what comes next.

These are all vulnerable states we find ourselves in when we put ourselves out there with no guarantee of what comes next after we’ve taken a leap of the heart.

If you’ve followed me for some time, you might know that I’ve photographed many solitary self-portraits of myself naked in nature over the years. As the journey of life has continued, I can look back and attest that the moments that have felt most naked for me have not been when literally naked or even when sharing images of myself naked with the world, but the times when I have taken a risk and spoken/embodied my truth in a way that was seen, both on the personal and public levels.

Each time I prepare for Descent Into Truth, behind the scenes I am always undergoing my own initiations that serve to strengthen my capacity to hold the container, in all kinds ways! Unexpectedly, in the last week I was guided (by the goddess Inanna herself) to stretch myself in how I am seen with this work by making daily videos to post online that are unscripted, quick, and imperfect in very short timeframes, all while sweating in a cave that’s over 100 F. This is a simple recipe for major discomfort probably for most people.

I am so blessed to be connected with so many beautiful souls in this community. I am truly touched by the ways in which we are able to support one another in our unique journeys! Thank you for being here!

Last week I shared about the sudden notice I received to vacate my remote desert sanctuary of the last 11+ years and how much heartbreak and grief I’ve been moving through in light of this unexpected initiation. I received so much incredible support in response, and was also so touched to hear about many different initiations that others are also moving through right now. Thank you for sharing your heart with me! We are in this wild ride together, and all shapes of our initiations offer us the opportunity to become stronger and more clear about what’s most important in our lives personally and collectively.

I find myself moving through an unexpected initiation that rocks the very foundation of my life. And the many stories I am hearing through friends, family, and clients are reflecting back to me the significant time of change we are all moving through in so many different ways, personally and collectively. Is a big initiation happening for you as well?

I hear myself as I say to clients that when we move through powerful cycles of healing and transformation, new cycles of initiation are activated. We are better prepared for deeper healing and bigger transformation that we weren’t ready for before. We are stronger now to meet the bigger work.

The greater the initiation, the greater the up-leveling.

Over the ages, there are many references of 40-day fasting periods as being significant in the evolution of spiritual teachers. This timing reflects the length of Venus’ Retrograde cycle and is no coincidence- the descending Evening Star and later rebirthed Morning Star on the horizon were visible markers in the sky to denote the beginning and ending of the 40-day initiation for these sages and saints.

Cleansing with the upcoming Venus Retrograde is a divine opportunity of utmost cosmic support for powerful transformation through devoted self-care.

Personally, I have experienced incredible healing and spiritual expansion through fasting/cleansing practices. I have extensive experience with plant-based eating, raw foods, juice fasting, water fasting, and even dry fasting. Through this work I have shed so much old programming, emotional pain, and physical imbalance. Over the years, my fasting practices have spanned 3 days to 120 days at a time, and each time something more is cleared, strengthened, and awakened within me. I’ve always listened to my guidance and my body in these experiences treading into the unknown. Fasting is a potent dive into confronting fears and all that hides in the shadows within that has worked for me- but it's not for everyone.

With the start of every new day, there comes a new beautiful opportunity to make changes that bring blessings, healing, and harmony to our lives. I love the flow of my mornings especially, full of sacred structure. Every so often I’ll consider what might need to change to bring in new energy to my days, for I’ve experienced countless times how the small, consistent daily choices I make create the greatest impact on how I feel every day and lead me somewhere new.

My upcoming offering Descent Into Truth expands upon this and provides a powerful sacred structure for transformation that is birthed from consistent daily practice working with Venus in retrograde. The consistent repetition of conscious choices made daily sets the foundation for significant change in our lives, no matter how simple that consistent daily practice may be.

One of my favorite examples of this is the simple daily choice of waking up early. As a once self-described Queen of the Snooze Button, the ability to wake up early in the morning out of personal preference has been one of my greatest transformative feats. For most of my life, the idea of waking up early was beyond undesirable and physically impossible. I was wired to go to bed late and wake up late, and I slept deeply and heavily. Many alarms were needed to wake me up if I needed to be somewhere in the morning. Unless a job or class required me to wake early, my usual morning wake-ups started my days around 9:30am, 10:30am, and often times as late as noon.

I’m delighted to be hearing of so much resonance with Descent Into Truth: A 42-Day Journey of Transformation Guided By Venus. I’m also hearing some of you are inspired to join, yet intimidated by committing to 42 days- especially during the busy holidays. If the thought of committing to a 42-day practice seems daunting to you, know that it can be approached in an easy way that takes no extra time out of your days. It can be as simple as turning the shower knob from hot to cold. :) A simple act like this for 42 days in a row can greatly shift your life in unexpected ways.

In Descent Into Truth, we work with Venus’ transformational retrograde by committing to a simple chosen daily practice for 42 days. 40+ days is the length of time required to implement change on a cellular level, and it’s no coincidence this is the length of time of Venus’ Retrograde! This is all part of a divine design to activate change for our greater good through devoted acts of self-love.

One week from today, the collective journey into the Underworld begins as Venus turns retrograde for 42 days. Venus, the planet of Love, establishes this portal of transformation to help us excavate and reflect on matters of the heart in this deeply inward journey.

During this time, we are asked to look at the shadows within the depths of the heart to bring awareness and Love to what has been hidden away. We work with this energy by recognizing what it is we carry deep within the heart that is unseen and in need of healing. It is a journey of radical self-love.

Venus is also the planet of beauty. That she, the archetype of beauty, mythologically is the guiding light into the Underworld, the place where our fears reside, tells us that the great journey we take to willingly descend into the Underworld enables us to discover the beauty that is hiding in the darkness.

In two weeks, Venus, the archetype of Love, turns retrograde for 42 days. Venus Retrograde is a powerful portal of transformation of the heart, and only occurs every 18 months. The divine timing of cosmic events is a reflection of what is occurring in our personal lives, and what we do with the energy makes a difference of how we experience it.

I find it very telling that this Venus Retrograde is coming around just as we have moved through a highly activated Eclipse portal- a significant portal of transformation in of itself. The message is clear: We are in an extraordinary time of transformation! The cosmos is setting the stage for us, and we are invited to participate in this cosmic dance by embracing the changes asked of us so that we may rise up into our truth and power.

Even more telling is that Venus Retrograde, mythologically represented as the descent of the Goddess into the Underworld to courageously undergo a death/rebirth, is occurring during the darkest days of the year (for those of us in the Northern Hemisphere). We are being asked to look into the darkness and embrace the depths of the heart to find the true love hiding within- the source of our greatest power.

If you are looking for more inspiration for thoughtful, loving gifts for loved ones or for yourself, I’m delighted to share with you a list of some of the most-treasured items in my life that are created by many people I love. I personally use everything I’m sharing, and have a personal relationship with almost every one of these makers/creators! When shopping, I always first look to my immediate community to see if I can support those nearest and dearest to me, and then start looking locally and strive to support small and ethically-minded businesses in all of my buying.

Thank you for being here and for being on this journey with me. I am so grateful for your presence, for reading my words and this blessed connection we share through this list whether you’ve just subscribed in the past week, or have been receiving my emails since I first started this list back in 2013. Thank you for helping me cultivate and grow a beautiful open-hearted community birthed out of Love.

Today, there may be a lot coming up for us in many different ways. If you need some inspiration or support to navigate this day, may gratitude spark the light of peace, connection, and love within you.

PRACTICING GRATITUDE TODAY AND EVERY DAY

Gratitude is a big part of my life. I have a devoted gratitude practice that I offer to the rising sun every single morning. I give my gratitude to the sun for rising every day, to the plants and animals that live on the land I inhabit, to my beloveds for their presence in my life, and to my breath for reminding me of the divinity that is ever-present, amongst many more things. This daily practice always brings me into present time and reminds me of the gifts that always surround me, even that which does not appear to be a gift. Articulating my gratitude helps me recognize the beauty of challenges I’m experiencing.

Today we welcome the New Moon in Scorpio, exact at 9:07pm Pacific, and with this energy comes the great opportunity to begin a new journey of transformation. This is a time for finding new ways of making great changes in our lives.

Scorpio embodies transformation. It is the death/rebirth cycle, the phoenix rising from the flames. Scorpio embodies that which we tend to not want to acknowledge: sex, money, death, trauma, and the shadow. Scorpio is what is hidden within us. This energy guides us to excavate what lies below the surface, and explore the darkest depths of our truth with commitment. Scorpio invites us to look at what is hard to see about ourselves, and to give ourselves the permission to feel the intensity of our feelings.

Through the process of digging down into the depths of darkness, we embark on a great healing journey that sets the stage for rebirth as we find our true light hiding in the darkest shadows.

With all that we have experienced thus far in 2020, this marks a time of transformative new beginnings, the beginning of a significant new cycle of change.

And it all starts with the new commitments we make with ourselves.

Over the last several days, I’ve been sharing some of the key benefits of the Womb Chakra system of practices. I’ve highlighted how the Womb Chakra work brings healing to the mother-child relationship, how it clears past relationship energy, heals heartbreak and trauma, how it helps make healers stronger in their work, and connects each of us to the Divine Feminine energy within.

With all I’ve been sharing lately about the Womb Chakra right alongside very heightened shifts and changes in our world, you might be wondering, “With everything else going on, why does this matter right now?” And my response to this, knowing the power of this work, is that this couldn't be a more aligned, more cosmically supported time to do this level of healing work.

Why does the Womb Chakra matter now?

The Womb Chakra, as explained in ancient palm leaf manuscripts found in India, is the most powerful energetic point in your body. But to access its full power and abilities, one must clear and release old karmas, negative energies, and traumas that are stored in the Womb Chakra. Once the Womb Chakra has been purified, you have the ability to harness divine energy that brings transformation to your life, the lives of others, and the world.

We all have Divine Feminine energy within us. This is beyond gender- this is about the divine energetics that connect each of us to the source creation energy of the Divine. Every human has the ability to access the Divine Feminine power within, and doing so serves to restore the true power of the Divine Feminine on the planet today. The more we are working to re-awaken this sacred energy within us, the more the Divine Feminine rises up with a divine force in this time of great change.

Your Womb Chakra is the direct access point to your Divine Feminine energy, and enables you to work with this sacred power for the greater good of all.

Through an ancient system of practices, you are able to unlock the greatest power within you. Harnessing the true, sacred power of the Divine Feminine within you enables you to call upon powerful healing energy for yourself, for others, and for the world. It strengthens your soul energy. It becomes a direct connection with the cosmic womb of all creation: both the place of oneness before manifestation and the place where are things come from.

The whole of creation is within the Womb Chakra.

When we find ourselves along the healing path, as we make progress in learning how to heal ourselves we naturally strengthen our ability to become healers for others. What we’ve experienced and learned in our own personal work becomes the foundation for inspired, meaningful new ways of sharing the gifts of our hard work with others.

Doing work as a healer is not something I personally sought out. When I first set out on my solitary desert path 10 years ago, I didn’t even know I was stepping onto a healing path, much less taking great steps to eventually become a healer. I never had a vision of being a healer, and yet it was an inevitable calling in light of the devoted work I did for myself over many years. I found myself on a continuously expanding journey of healing myself on so many levels, and in doing so I awakened to the abilities within me and was given the sacred tools to help others bring great healing and transformation to their lives.

I awakened to the essence of my divinity, and the light of this truth illuminated the path before me. This is the source of the healing energy within me. And divinity is the source of the healing energy within you.

We are in the midst of a powerful time when so much is being kicked up to the surface in our lives so that we may bring healing to that which we are ready to be free of. We see it so clearly: anything and everything is being activated in these wild times, and it’s all for the purpose of clearing and completing life-long karmic cycles, enabling us to take great leaps ahead in our soul’s work and truly move forward transformed.

So much is compounding individually and collectively this year because this is the time to do the big work. It is a divinely-timed opportunity for making great advancements in our lives and on the planet. Things that we’ve been working to bring healing to for many years are now up for completion- there is great cosmic support to bring healing and release to lifelong blocks, limiting beliefs, and old paradigm conditioning.

One of the places so many karmic opportunities arise for healing is within relationships. Perhaps you are noticing core issues rise up in your relationship lately. Perhaps old unresolved energy from past relationships is making its way into your thoughts or your dreams. Perhaps you are witnessing the relationships of others go through many tests and trials these days. I’m certainly feeling it and seeing it.

Unresolved pain from previous intimate (physical and/or heart-based) connections stays with us and impacts the experiences we have with others in present-time. Karmic cycles inevitably repeat themselves with different people until the core woundings are tended to and healed.

For most of my life, my most challenged relationship has been with my mother. Perhaps you can relate, as so often the mother-child relationship can be the most complex relationship in our lives to navigate.

Indeed, on a soul-level, it is the most charged connection we have in our lives. It can demand our greatest work when the relationship is discordant in any way. It can prove to be the greatest challenge on the healing path. And it makes sense when you think about the potent fact that you and your mother were once one. You were once inside her womb; your entire developing body enveloped within her body. And it was from her womb that you were birthed into the world.

And both despite and because of this deeply intimate soul connection we share with our mothers, it is quite common for there to be so much work to do around this relationship. It can be a highly sensitive topic for those of us who’ve had a troubled or traumatizing relationship (or non-relationship) with our mothers in any kind of way.

Even for those of us that have been blessed with a present, attentive mother growing up are not spared the deeply challenging and complex lessons that demand to be learned through this most powerful soul relationship.